Drove home from work today with the top down. I haven't driven with the top down since Top-Down! Andy moved to Europe, mostly because of the rain, but also because of life in general not being much more than blue. Having the top down was fantastic. It's good to see the sun.

It was a start contrast to the drive this morning to see a new doctor. I had a growth on the side of my right eye that I wanted looked at, and went with the easiest route: making an appointment for the next doctor when I'm seeing a different one for something else.

So, I was half undressed when the doctor walks in and offers her hand. She's a petite, adorable, ridiculously young woman with a gentle demeanor. She was probably late twenties (total projection on my part, I can't tell ages in Asians at all). I'm totally guessing that she's just starting her practice, and doesn't have a full schedule, as I was 40 minutes late (I thought I was 10 minutes early) and she was still able to see me (thankfully).

One really good thing about young doctors is that they are more likely to be up-to-date with the latest techniques. Not that I needed anything special this time. The doctor offered to cut the growth off and have it analyzed. I accepted and 10 minute later, the growth was gone. She warned me of bruising (none), and lingering pain (lots), but the area is healing nicely.

And the growth is gone. Whoo!

By the middle of the day, the clouds were also leaving, and we had sunshine. I was surprised at how quickly things dried out, allowing me to drive with the top down on my way to communal dinner.

I ended up driving behind a first generation CRX, made me think of my old car. Sometimes I miss the thing. I usually realize soon after, though, that the car itself is not what I miss, but the experiences and memories surrounding the car. From purchasing it, to the cross country trips, to the drives to Arizona, to the dashboard getting destroyed in, to the back bumper getting ripped off (funny, both those disasters happened because of Amerigon, oddly enough), to the fantastic gas mileage, to the drive north, to Doyle's borrowing, to the eventual sell, that car came with me through nearly 12 years. A lot of life in that time.

Which made me think of an NPR segment I heard recently, on the weekend I think. It was about a guy who made journal recordings of his life, including through his ordeal with cancer, until his eventual, premature death. His wife would often listen to the recordings for comfort. I think I sound like a dork, more so than most people think they sound like dorks, so I hesitate to start audio-blogging. But, what better way to overcome the shyness about recording my voice than actually doing it. Same with vlogging, I think. Stick a camera in front of you, hit record and start talking.

The whole story was very sad, but incredibly fascinating. To be able to hear a loved one after death, hear their thoughts, begin to understand their life, what a great time we live in now.

The audio tapes reminded me of audio-blogging, which immediately made me think of Mini and Messina and Tara. The three of them amaze me.

Mini works with (underprivileged?) high-schoolers in the SmashCast program, where these students research then produce podcasts of math and science topics. The work Mini does is all like this: it makes the world a better place. She sees wrongs and wants to make them right. Messina and Tara are the same way. And that's what amazes me about them, and others like them. I see what they see and think, good lord, say hello to the windmill. They look and see places where they can make a positive difference, where they want to make a difference.

I've done work for Mini, but am unable to continue. I've been paring down my work. I'm tired and am unable to become ethusiastic for other people's projects. I've needed to say "No." for the longest time, but haven't been able to, and as a result, I've been unbearably busy with other people's projects/problems. So, I need to step away from Mini's projects as I (FINALLY!) ended the contract with the UPA today. The ending has made me sad.

The sadness is actually unexpected. I expected to be happy to be reducing how much work I have, how busy I am. I expected to be excited I could head off to communal dinner without my computer, and actually socialize. For all the change that exists in my life, I'm still not used to it. I'm still resisting some. Still getting blue with others.

What a pain to try to time.

If you're an American, then tonight around one in the morning, you were lucky to experience 1:02:03 on 04-05-06 this morning.

Of course, if you live anywhere else in the world, you'll need to wait just under a month for your 1 2 3 4 5 6.

Wow.

I'm not sure how to catch up on 18 years of life, but Jenn and I gave it a valient effort tonight.

Jenn Chase is in the area for a few days for a bio-chem conference, and graciously took the train down to Palo Alto to meet up with me for dinner. Having not kept in touch with my H.S. crowd, and not sure what to expect, I excitedly drove up, then parked in the wrong area. I wasn't sure I'd recognize her, but was clearly an idiot in that uncertainty. She had the same smile and gestures, longer hair (curlier than I recall), but the same color, and totally the same mannerisms. How I thought I could miss her I have no idea.

We talked about the whole group, how everyone has kept in touch (except me! I disappeared from their perspective). The various traditions they've done (every wedding has a photo of Jenn held horizontally by the boys), and how she earned the nickname "Bilure" if only for one wedding.

We talked about kids (Jeff 5, Paul 3, Brad 2, Scott 1), and how neither of us were particularly gung-ho on having them (she especially not so as a single parent, "Sometimes you just need a neutral party to tell you, yes, that small person is going psycho, just ignore her"), and how she helped several girls during their senior year, college-prep time.

We talked about families and how her grandparents are still alive, her parents are trying out a dual (summer/winter) house arrangement to see if they like it. How housing prices have increased, and yes, I live in the most expensive area in the country and she does. How she's visited every state but Hawaii, and did she want to go to Hawaii in three weeks with me and my mom? How she has a sister in Colorado, and my brothers are dispersed across Arizona (and how we can't seem to get away from the name Ch|Kris).

We talked briefly about high school and how I went to what would have been my tenth reunion had I stayed in Indiana. How I had grown past needing the approval of all of these former classmates, but so many others hadn't. We talked about how some of the group had gone to some of our reunions, but I hadn't gone to any because I keep getting invited to the wrong ones.

We talked about C. S. Lewis' Mere Christianity and how I had written an essay on the book for Mr. Lutz's class. And how Jenn remembered that essay because it was for honors credit (we could take a regular as an honor class by doing extra work, earning a 4.5 on a 4.0 scale if we did well), and that I got an extension through the Christmas break on the essay, but that she wasn't able to get an extension or the honors credit because it required 8 of 10 extra essays in a specified time frame and she had already missed three deadlines, so couldn't get the credits.

How my 5.0 semester our senior year (on a 4.0 scale) propelled me from 12th in the class to 6th, and that if anyone could be bitter, it would be Scott, who dropped from 10th to 11th on my jump. Jenn commented that indeed, it didn't matter at that point, since she was 5th in the class (Alon, Bender, Tina, Roger, Jenn, me, others), and therefore no longer bitter about it (where the bitter part was in jest, but she did remember that Lutz gave me that extension, so there's something still there).

We briefly talked about philosophy and the theory by some Ha- philosopher that said public opinion and social contracts developed in the last few centuries, but public mass media destroyed the public's sense of self by telling the public what to think.

We talked about Oxford and Jeff visits to Yale, various Bio-chemistry techniques, sick rats vs. healthy and her writing her dissertation; that there's no snow where she lives, but there is at least one big tournament there a year.

My stories tended to be much more long winded. So much so that I often forgot the point of the story, but usually managed to recall it after backtracking through our thoughts. I talked a bit about Caltech, lost books, Amerigon, Wook, and my work on Antz and Shrek. And my missed trip with Paul last year, casually mentioning his not-so-sane parents (clearly my opinion, mind you!) and why I lost contact, my brief attempt at contact with her a decade ago (which she recalled, yay!), and Kris's meeting up with Matthew after many years, including the reason for the falling out and the communications that restored the friendship.

I'm unbelievably happy she travelled down to visit me, if only for a few hours. Time to start planning a trip to Idaho.

All these thoughts of making a long post instead of lots of short posts have gone completely out the window. Short posts are now going up, too. I just need to figure out how to insert images easily and I'll be all set.

Tyler emailed me today wondering when the Mixed finals would be at the UPA Club Championships this year in October. The event is October 26-29, but, since he has to fly home early on Sunday, he might miss the Mixed finals on Sunday.

Well, here's what we figured out: the order of division play is consistent: the Women's division follows the Mixed division follows the Open division follows the Women's division. Last year, Open played first, followed by Mixed then Women's. The year before, Women's played first, followed by Open, then Mixed.

Therefore, this year, if everything follows as before, Mixed will play first, followed by Women's, then Open.

Now, the weather has been every other year is a brutal wind year. This past year was a just-after-hurricane event. So, if everything follows trends (yeah, yeah, past performance is no guarantee of future returns), this'll be a non-windy year.

Now, that Tyler is thinking about the finals at this point in the season is absolutely fantastic. However, because he's heading home mid-afternoon on Sunday, well, he's cut.

Yay, muscles! Heading to the trainer these last three weeks has meant that all my muscles have gotten bigger (and presumably stronger, but definitely bigger). Movements are easier (still not used to sitting down without the knee twinge, but I haven't felt one recently).

Downside is, nothing fits. My pants, which were nearly fitting two weeks ago, now don't fit at all. And rather than losing weight, <sarcasm>joy of joys</sarcasm>, I've gained weight. I, who have pretty much never worried about my weight, am wondering about my weight. Yeah, yeah, muscle weighs more than fat, I know, I know. Still. I'd like to see some of that fat go away. No Grandma Saddle Bags! No Grandma Saddle Bags!

All these new muscles do me little good if they can't handle the effort of ultimate. Time to start getting some good, long runs in for base fitness. Last week at the tryouts, I was definitely one of the slow women top speed-wise in the sprints. I'm guessing I know how to use what speed I have, since I'm still getting open without the speed of old.

Note to self: if you play ultimate really hard, don't go do a hard leg workout the next day. You won't do so well. Take a day of rest instead.