Okay, so, there's this twitter meme where if someone steps away and leaves his phone available, the people around him find his twitter client and tweet "Poopin." It's quite common actually:

I was actually confused about it when I noticed the fifth or sixth "Poopin'" post, and asked Jonathan about it. He explained it to me, and I just had to laugh. A lot.

Now, I'm not allowed to touch the computer at Andy's. Having tweeted from his account about just how spectacular I am (okay, not really, but I did tweet a lot over a short period of time, not realizing they all went to Andy's Facebook account, causing Andy's Facebook friends to comment, "whoa whoa whoa slow down with the updates there, buddy."), I'm not allowed to even unlock Andy's screen saver any more. Not that we don't all know the password to it - we do. We're just not allowed to type it in if we aren't telling the truth (and well, I'd be lying if I typed in his password).

So, no access to his computer.

However, after Saturday's honey harvest, his ipad was accessible.

And sitting RIGHT. NEXT. TO. ME.

Right.

Andy was not pleased.

First email this morning:

Immediately followed by:

I guess I won't be playing with Andy's ipad any time soon.

Off to change the password on my ipad...

I started the day off by heading to see Toy Story 3 with Mike, Liza, Maeryn and Liza's friend Niya. I have to say, if you're going to see a Pixar film, seeing it with a theatre of under-10 year olds is the best way to see it. There were giggles in places I wasn't expecting them and squeals of delight in all the places I was.

At the scary part (yeah, the part where even I was a little stunned at it), I looked over to see Liza and her friend huddled together, eyes wide staring at the screen, comforting each other as the scene progressed. "This is the part your dad told us about!" I heard her friend tell Liza. Maeryn herself was curled under Mike's arm for protection.

Me?

I had my arms around me.

After the movie, I had the distinct joy of heading into the bathroom with three girls, two of them chatting away across stalls. Maeryn and I bonded after each of us took care of our own business, when she showed me her ring.

Look at it.

Isn't it gorgeous?

All that said, I enjoyed the movie. It was fun, and didn't have any moment where I rolled my eyes or looked at my watch. Well, except for the moment when my watch alarm went off at 11:11.

And the parts where both Jonathan and Michael cried at? Suckers. You both warned me enough that I made it through tissue-free.

So, after spending much of the evening putting in new flooring in the kitchen (yeah, more on that), I wandered into the bathroom slightly exhausted and wanting, well, to pee. Fairly simple need, and I was heading in the right direction.

I turned on the light, walked two feet into the bathroom, and smack into a tiny spider hovering at eye-level from the ceiling. "Gaaaaah!*" was about as coherent as I could be as I jumped backwards towards the way I had come in, looking down as I attempted to keep my balance.

As I glanced down, I noticed another tiny spider, the same size as the first one which had just ambushed me.

"Gah!*" I called out again.

Fortunately, Kris speaks fluent frantic wife, and called out to ask what was going on in the next room over.

Looking up, I saw another tiny spider on the wall next to the door, eyes on me as it readied its little legs to pounce on me as I brushed past on my way back out of the room.

My hands flicked on the light switch and I glanced up. No fewer than four spiders were happily circling the top of the door, eyes on the bigg tasty morsel that must be bringing curds or maybe whey to the feast.

"GAAAAAAAH!*" I called out, taking the last step back out the bathroom, and catching my breath as my heart started slowing from the race pace it had leapt to.

"What?!?" I heard from the other room. "What is it?"

"CHARLOTTE!" I called back. "She just webbed all over us!"

Silence.

I looked around.

"What does that mean?" Kris asked, eyes still glued to the screen as Furrow Pumpkin Farm drifted across his screen in a simulated rain.

"It means, we have a hundred baby spiders in our bathroom! And they just attacked me!"

"Attacked, huh?"

"Ambushed!"

"Right. And you're going to do what?"

"Come back in, all guns blazing!"

"You do that."

Gathering up my courage, I returned back to the bathroom, a damp tissue in hand and began squishing the spiders. For each one I squished, two more dropped from the ceiling in a rush. They were on the sink, and the tub; on the mirror and on the toilet; they were on the wall and on the window. I swear, all of Charlotte's eggs burst at once (because, well, that's what they're supposed to do and all).

It wasn't long before the toilet bowl was full of tissues and spider carcasses, and still they dropped down onto my neck, onto my arms, and under my feet. Do you know how hard it is to kill an attacking swarm of spiders without having the hairs on the back of your neck stand up and your body cover in goosebumps, just knowing they're all gunning for you?

It's hard!

Hard!

After a couple dozen spider deaths, I gave up. They'd be gone by morning, scattered throughout the house where I could kill them in one-on-one combat, none of this swarming business. Or, if they were smart, they'd sneak out the open window while their bodies were still small enough to fit through the screen mesh.

We'll see how well they do without their siblings to help them out.

GAAAAAH!*

One just dropped from my hair onto my keyboard!

*Editor's note: "gah" is short for "f---". Just saying is all.

Tonight, for reasons that are completely incomprehensible to me at this moment, I decided that "NOW IS THE TIME" for me to redo the kitchen flooring. The new laminate has been sitting in the living room for months (MONTHS!) now, and darn-it, it was time to finishing putting lipstick on this pig.

So, I pulled out the first piece from the box, tried to figure out which corner to put it in, trimmed it down, put it in the corner and nailed it down. That first piece didn't seem so hard, so I placed the next piece. Okay, that was simple enough, I thought after a couple pieces were down, and shoved the oven out of the way to clean under it.

Two hours later, and I've finished half of the kitchen.

I have to say I am thrilled at finally covering up some of the gouges that have been in the old flooring since we moved in. They've pretty much always annoyed me.

I need some help moving the oven to its old location, but over the edge of the new flooring and the old flooring, and some time to move all the items from the racks in my well-stocked kitchen. I'm not sure about the refrigerator, though, how much it'll move easily. I recall from when Melissa was around that one of the two big appliances moves easily, so it must be the fridge because the oven sucks.

I ended up putting felt circles on some furniture sliders to go under the oven feet. I figure they'll last all the way up until I need to mop the floor, then be completely destroyed. In the meantime, I can slide the over around a bit.

I wasn't sure about the color of the floor after I had bought it and thought about it for a while. I bought it to match the living room's hardwood floors, but think it may end up being too dark for the room. That it matches Bella's coloring nearly perfectly is a humourous observation and quite possibly part of my motivation.

"If a ladybug lands on you, is that lucky?"

"Yes, that's really lucky."

"I had ten ladybugs land on me this school year."

"I think that makes you the luckiest boy in the world."

"Not really. I ate five of them."

*blink*

*blink* *blink*

"They taste like lettuce."